Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Shorter Christopher Hitchens:

If Al Gore wins the Nobel Peace Prize, he really might run for president, because his feelings about the Clintons are remarkably similar to my own.

Hitchypoo's exact words:

I am only guessing here, but I think that when Gore wakes up early and upset, he isn't whimpering about the time that the Supreme Court finally ruled against him in 2000. He is whimpering about the time in 1992 when he left the field open to Bill Clinton, a man he secretly despised. Can he really stand to watch yet another Clinton walk away with a nomination that could have been, or could still be, his?

Yes, that's right: Gore is now one of the most respected people in the world, his books and movie have been hugely successful, he's changed the way the entire country approaches the issue of climate change -- yet he's still seething with resentment and can't get past a turn of events from fifteen years ago involving that scumbag Bill Clinton, just as Hitchens can't get past whatever the hell transpired when he and Clinton were at Oxford together. And winning a Nobel would make Gore stew over disappointments from the distant past even more, because, I guess, his life will suck so much. Yeah, that makes sense.

Bonus fun quote from Hitch:

George Bush at his worst is preferable to Gerhard Schroder or Jacques Chirac -- politicians who put their own countries in pawn to Putin and the Chinese and the Saudis.

As Robert Farley says at Lawyers, Guns & Money:

Right; because this administration is notable primarily for standing up to the Saudis and Chinese on.... well, I'm not sure, but maybe it makes sense in Hitch's world.

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